THE X-FILES

Too Cool for the Square Screen Scene

Hard to say what is more eagerly awaited by X-Philes: Mulder and Scully in a lip-lock, or details of the secret conspiracy aiding (or are they?) the colonization of the Earth by gooey black oil aliens from before the dawn of time. Take your pick - all is fulfilled here (or is it?). Here's the details of the plot:

What's that you say? You don't want me spoiling it for you? Well, that may be the one big fault of this movie - it gives things away too easily. After so many seasons of watching TV FBI agents Fox "Spooky" Mulder and Dana "Spooky" Scully slowly gathering pieces of the Big Puzzle together every week on the Fox "Spooky" Network, I feel kind of cheated that so much information is just handed to them here, mostly by Martin Landau, who plays a  gynocologist and conspiracy buff who's poked around a few too many dark holes in his quest for secrets. What was formerly revealed in hints is blatantly explained away here, making sci-fi porn out of what should be an artfull striptease.

That aside, this is a movie that should satisfy the fans. More surprising: it just may work better for the non-fans. Those not stoked with expectations will be free to have their minds blown by a well-crafted sci-fi adventure thriller of engaging complexity. Creator/writer Chris Carter and director Rob Bowman have left in a few head-scratchers for the uninitiated, such as when Mulder's comic buddies the Lone Gunmen show up without explanation to help him out and then disappear from the film.

Basically, this is what a double episode of the TV series would look like with about ten times the budget - perhaps an arguement that true art is produced under pressure. The constraints of TV force Carter and company to create a rhythm and atmosphere that maintains tension during commercial breaks and even through summer rerun season. Here, they have the freedom to cut to the giant monster whenever they want, and there's no chance for that delicious sense of anticipation we've grown to love.

Killer monster aliens; goopy space critters from inside the hollow earth; gory corpses; contract killers; p-star Landeau; explosions; flying saucer; black helicopters; ancient, insideous secret global conspiracy; bullet in the head; killer bees.

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